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Brokedick Mountain

Looks like a horse cock. I don't believe I've ever said that in a non-complementary form.

04/30/11

Porn Noob Pwns Himself

Big fat curved penis sends a fresh wad of home cooked Twinky filling right back into the face of it's creator. It's not a problem I expect to incur any time soon but I do retain faith in the bottle of Extenze my sister so kindly purchased me last xmas. Similar videos HERE & HERE.

04/19/11 Fail

Obnoxious Girl Is Obnoxious

She's drunk, high and/or possibly retarded... all of which adequately explain why she's fucking a dude that has less hair than Mr. Magoo and singing along to shitty techo beats. The real question is... who's dick did she have to suck for that badassical Santa Clause skirt? I dig it.

03/29/11 WTF

Gangbang Fail

A dozen black dudes slated to mass pummel a 90 pound Mexiho bring production to a halt after a fight breaks out on set. Unfortunately the camera is pointed down for much of the action, so in place of flying fists we see the donkey dicks of numerous men - many of whom continue to fap as they spectate.. which I find fucking hilarious.

Damaged Goods

Director gets annoyed after discovering the star of his young/innocent themed porno flick is actually a post-crackwhorian guttertramp with a horrendous tattoo right where it counts. That's like casting Steven Segal in a drama about terminally ill lesbians. Some things you just cant pull off, no matter how big your ponytail is.

Big Meaty Balls

He's got a 7 inch penis. You know what that means? He's fuckin John Stamos of the internet. And what better way to assert your superiority than to beat off on camera while talkin dirty in your finest batman voice? You da man.

02/10/11 LULZ

Cockblockers

Two dudes fuck with their friend just as he's about to dick down some big tittied bar-slut in the backseat of his mom's Ford Taurus. Shot from dual angles for dual humiliation.

12/20/10 Busted!

Hart Breaker

Adult modeling. The only industry where knowing how to suck dick supercedes spelling and grammar.

12/17/10

Get Bent

His penis looks like a rotten banana. Could probably double as a personal coat hanger if enough viagra was involved. So does any of this slow him whenever he feels like getting his dick wet? Apparently not. Must be the personality.

11/28/10 LULZ

38 Years Without Ejaculation

In retrospect, "I Make It Rain" by Lil Wayne would've been a more appropriate soundtrack... but I think you get the idea. Check out more epic ballsack videos @ monsterballs.com.

10/18/10 Bizarre

I Love Meaty

Just another black dude relying on his 4865 inch penis to assert himself - much at the expense of some poor chick's uterus. First I masturbate. Then I criticize. woot woot.

10/08/10 LULZ

Feminist Attacks Cocky Stripper

Dude shoves his junk in the wrong chicks face. First she smacks his cock like a cheap pinata, then follows up with an ashtray to the face. Quite a feisty bitch. I think somebody put their tampon up the wrong hole.

Hammer Head

The novelty of having a 10 inch cock sure does fade quick when the head of your penis looks like a Platypus LOL. Rotate your dick 90 degrees and run it over with your Monte Carlo. You'll be aight. Video from ANAL IN THE AMAZON.

09/12/10 Bizarre

LOL Sexual Inferiority

Ya know what... when you're stuck with 4.2 inch weiner and the endurance of that fat fuck from ABC's Lost... propositioning a random big-dicked black dude to bang your wife really might not be all that great of an idea.

08/17/10 Premature

Awesome Fail

I dont know whats more fucked up: the fact that he's boning a woman older than jesus or how the enjoyment he gets from it leaves him socially retarded and unable to saying anything more than "AWESOME!". This is what happens when you use Craigslist to get your dick wet you dirty motherfuckers.

07/26/10 LULZ

She HATES Blowjobs LOL

When you weigh as much as the couch you're nesting on... performing fellatio is practically considered "exercise". Naturally she's not a fan. What's special though is her mock enthusiasm right at the end. You can literally see calories being burned as she imitates the standard pornstar approach to sucking dick. It's mesmerizing.

06/27/10 LULZ

Lemme Smell Yo Dick

One of the shittiest XXX films I've seen in my time... edited down to a cool 60 seconds. It's nothing amazing but fuck... it's got a plot revolving around accusations of sheep rape and worse acting than a Segal flick. How could I not post it?

06/27/10 Vintage

Is It In Yet

Hector and his 2.5 inch pop gun (their measurements, not mine) get an earful of criticism after disappointing a gang of size queens... and nailing himself in the forehead with his own payload. Sorry friend but I think it's best you take your cocktail sausage and head on back to that strawberry field you done crawled up out of.

06/07/10 FuckTeamFive LULZ

Before & After

An upclose look at the genitalia of a Brazillian gutterslut directly before and after having an intimate encounter with Jamal Jones Jr the 3rd. The rectal damage is top shelf.

05/21/10 Prolapse

Meanwhile in Russia...

Dude unwittingly got himself a front row seat to Russia's biggest shit extravaganza.

05/16/10 LULZ
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