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Uploaded 05/04/16
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Porn Scenes Worthy of an Oscar 5

Volume #5 in a collection of videos that Charlie Sheen would be ashamed to attach his name to. And without even a single appearance from a graduate of the Woodman School of Rectology, that's saying something.

36 Inches, No Fears

If you think that number is talking about hog dimensions, you will be sorely mistaken. It seems this attraction has stricter height limitations than Six Flag's El Toro. You gotta measure less than 4 feet tall, well-versed in THOTology and be next in line for a fight with Jake Paul. Brutal. Part 1 [HERE] Part 2 [HERE] Support [HERE]

02/01/24 Mildly Retarded

Accidental Cum Shot

Noob's first and final attempt at porn stardom lands him in a gang bang shoot. He doesn't care, he thinks he's ready for anything... but nothing can prepare you to be a premature ejaculator's innocent bystander. PEW PEW

03/04/16 LULZ

Ratchet Compilation 2K17

Another edition of ratchet sex tape fails featuring hood rat stuff like fire alarms with dying batteries, one lopsided illegal butt implant and other ghetto stuff.

01/26/17 LULZ

Unacceptable Devices XIII

Another quarter, another gaggle of beatniks that are one step closer to finding a way to fit more military equipment in their gravy cave than an aircraft carrier. Emphasis on the mini gorlock seen around the 5:45 mark. You'll never look at cave diving the same again.

The Worst of OnlyFanz VII

Alright fellas, [-take a memo on your Newton-]: If girls aren't flocking to your Levi's like 1 star reviews to the newest Disney remake, then this might be in your future. Just keep track of those subscription fees so reality doesn't hit harder than 1996 did to Robert Downey Jr.

"IT'S TOO BIG!"

06/16/25

50 Cumshot Breakdown

Today we witness the consequences of a pair of unprepared siblings literally biting off more than they can chew. Let's just say, getting caught in the crossfire of 4 dozen men that consider cabbage and beer a major food group, wasn't the one-way ticket to fame they originally thought it was haha.

11/21/22 Breakdowns

The Truth About Marylin Manson

"I drank the coke out of my mom's douchebag" - MM

03/03/21 Famous

Dismantling an 80lb Pornstar

This girl might as well be the Napoleon Dynamite of fetish videos. (read: perfection). Doesn't even need to be penetrated. Just watching life flash before her eyes in between each fault line cracking was enough to keep my Fruit of the Looms soggy.

09/13/21 LULZ

"Everything Makes Me Cum"

For a box that probably has more miles on it than grandads '69 Chevelle; it's in stellar condition. In fact, it might be setting the bar too high for fellow terrorKink enthusiasts to follow. I don't know if I should be impressed or slide in those DM's and ask for the cattle prod discounts. According to this video, they do exist. More RDG [HERE] and [HERE]

08/18/22 Kink.com Orgasms

The Discomfort Zone

You know the deal: It's the height of the pandemic and funds are circling the drain. So you hit up the local videographers and offer your services to the highest bidder. I_CUM_HELLMANS hits up your DM's on Reddit and now the smell never washes off. GG NO RE

08/02/21 HeavyOnHotties Fail
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